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By Katdapba Yunana Gobum)
Life's journey for all humans has its ups and downs. Everyone of us goes through it one way or another.
No matter the degree of life's vicissitudes, the way to surmount all that it brings depends on the quality of character imbued in a person.
Have you ever heard Rev Dr Soja Bewarang, former President of COCIN and Christian Association of Nigeria (CAN) tell his life's story?
He tells it matter of factly; without being ashamed of the details of his parentage. He is not used to theatrics, that can be pleasing to the listener.
If he was a performer on stage, he may likely fail acting his parts. But he is a pastor, thus confining the relevance of acting his parts well for didactic consequences.
The reason may not be far fetched: He tells his listener the truth as it should be. It is little wonder, he was called to serve in God's vineyard.
For a man whose background and upbringing are a lesson for children, who are documented to have disparaged their parent's stations in life, his is one which should serve them well.
Come to think of it, if he was a politician, it is likely he may not survive this terrain. Truth is, no politician could be in the mould of a pastor.
It was Mark Twain who wrote: Politics is the only profession where you can lie, cheat, and steal, and still be respected. Not in all cases, if I might add.
God has helped him to rise above certain challenges of life, far above what some may have limited him to as: Son of a nobody!
It has been well documented, he bcame a 'son of nobody' (sorry for the usage); rising to lead the Church of Christ in Nations (COCIN) as its President.
An outbreak of meningitis had reduced his parents at young age to a pitiable status, but it was not enough to take away the joy of having children that would later change the course of history.
In fact, the meningitis attack ravaged the area that his father had one of his hands amputated, while his mother was consigned to the status of a deaf and dumb.
Some sons would have preferred they abandon them in the village, while they run to the city, start a life and live big, while their parents languish in abject penury back home.
Soja Bewarang would not contemplate such option; he had better initiatives up his sleeves: Being the first child, he had to struggle to earn a living to pay his way to school and take care of his four siblings.
It is a known fact, man cannot act God in the affairs of men: 'For promotion cometh neither from the east, nor from the west, nor from the south.
'But God is the judge: he putteth down one, and setteth up another, so says the Psalmist'.
God has been gracious in the most amazing ways to him and his family. If his story does not inspire you, the lines below may change your perspective.
Small beginnings that are not disparaged have always resulted in large accomplishments. That is not lost in the course destiny has shaped his life for.
Humanly speaking, the things of the spirit may be complex for easy comprehension; yet, when they begin to fall in place, one is tempted to remain awed in their manifestation.
Early in life, he was aware that being born into a Christian family was not an automatic licence to become one. He had to work out his personal salvation at 17 years old. For 60 of his 77 years walking this earth, he has stayed committed to serving the one who called him.
At the theological college, the name he was given at birth was 'recaliberated' to fit the path he had chosen. He was no longer 'Soja', he was to be known and called: Serve Only Jesus Always.
This year, he is in his 77th year of birth, but sadly, he has been without the mother of his children, Matwok Mercy Kande Bewarang since August 2020.
Since August 2020, his status changed; he became a widower, left to take charge of the children and of himself. No doubt, it is a difficult task to undertake; only those who have experienced it may tell the story better.
That experience has enabled him write, 'Finding Grace in the Silence of Loss-A Pastor's Five-Year Journey of Grace as a Widower', a book that chronicles what widowers go through that are hardly taken note of. It was presented to the reading public on November 23, 2025.
It is an addition to the body of knowledge that often, when a spouse is gone; society erroneously believes that the man, particularly if he is a clergy is capable of withstanding the pains of the loss.
For the man, it is believed, he is able to go all the way alone. Very few are able to discern that the men, have emotions, even also as they bear the burdens of many things as the women.
Experience, they say is the best teacher. Five years down the road, without his soulmate, he is well-placed to come to the aid of others in similar position with a word on how to weather the storm of loneliness and boredom.
But, far more than having had close affiliation with members of his various congregations over the years, he stands in a better stead to know the pains spouses go through in their loss.
Today, for no fault of anyone, the shelves are filled with sufficient literature on widows and their travails; however, there is little or nothing to read about on widowers.
On account of the silence from the widowers, many who operate from the pulpit, most are of the opinion that they are least affected. Their silence, is often mistaken for acquiescence of their travails.
His effort is a journey shared; to bring hope, but more specifically to comfort more of those in the same class; who may not have the opportunity to speak out.
He however admits, there is a grace to sustain the brokenhearted especially those involved as clergy and church workers; who are often not given the opportunity to tell the world their predicament.
If you have followed him, you may have discovered that he has often quoted Psalm 34:18, when he visits bereaved families and others affected by a calamity; just so that he can calm frayed nerves, and reassure them of what God is able to do in such circumstances.
Between 2012 and 2013, he served as President of the Church of Christ in Nations (COCIN). He had earlier served as its Vice President from 2005 to 2011, and the Leading Pastor of the COCIN Headquarters Church.
It has not been forgotten, he was the Provost Gindiri Theological Seminary from 1985 - 2000 and Chairman of the Christian Association of Nigeria (CAN), Plateau State chapter.
Shortly after servicing as COCIN President, in 2013, he was made a Professor of Educational Leadership and Administration by the Gindiri Theological Seminary.
(By Walbe Orgak) 
